The hardest thing for me as a grandmother writing about love, was to cut away all that is incidental and keep only that which remains as the nobility and science of ecstasy.
As a writer and woman whose loved and lost, I feel like it is impossible to build good relationships until we’ve burned away our youth and its fairy tales, as well as learned misapprehensions from our past. Sometimes you don’t know how much you care for someone until they are gone out of your life.
I must admit creating a book like this is like having a foot in two worlds. The world of adulation and the world of poetic love. I’ve loved and lost a lot in my time. I’ve learned there is seldom forever except in fantasy. Still, who can resist new making new attachments? Many amorous relationships begin simply enough, maybe even, at first sight. Don’t be too sure they will last. It is a universal fact the first three months you will struggle like a clown.
As for lovers, well, they’ll come and go too, and we’ll pay attention. When we’re younger, we look for fun, communication, and compatibility. The young often tactlessly mistake lust for love. They are eager for entanglements. They are also infested with idealism rather than complacent and ready to settle down.
As we get older, we appreciate the security of honest camaraderie, respect and a positive attitude that promotes good well-being. Of course, mutual fondness with a little kissing and a lot of hugging for them is like icing on the cake.
What is love? Scientists say love is a complex emotion triggered by our brain not so much the heart like the media wants us to believe. A poet would say love is like sunshine. It makes us glow with inner warmth. It makes our eyes reflect joy and our hearts beat with enchantment. Every step we take is a stride full of eagerness and adventure. Love is best when served when our realities are better than our dreams. Whatever it is, it is a language we all need to learn.
Even the commercial symbol for the heart is designed as a welcoming buttock with pen in hand. Perhaps, most of us feel wherever love resides, it is a deep and profound sense of spontaneous adoration for another, firstly as attraction and then emotional attachment. Scientists have advised us sometime in the future we may take a pill for our ailing emotions like love-sickness, heartache, and loneliness. I’d personally love a pill for grieving after a split-up. But right now, it feels like we love with all our heart; and, we think ourselves into heartache from unrequited love.
It’s normal to love our friends in case you’re wondering. Friendship is, after all, really the best salve for the pangs of disillusioned love. Yet, in some cases, it might be hard to tell the difference between platonic friendship and romantic love like in the movie When Harry Met Sally. This is a great time to consider your priorities.
What are you looking for in a partner? Are you looking for romance or companionship? Do you want to try to take your relationship to the next level? There are many ways you can figure this out without risking your friendship. Scientists may be right, we’re not in love until we think we are. Of course, we love others and we love things. We love giving, receiving, and we love doing things. The media and arts continue to be consumed by efforts to promote romantic love. Do you want more love in your life? It is true once we’ve experienced this emotion- in- motion, we crave it above all else.
This was the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed.