Rat Incense

This story is from the Nightmare Book. The nightmare was described by the Troll Queen Shadowtrollia in her personal diary.

“I am in a banquet at the Elf Palace with my two younger sons. Everything in this palace is weird: On the floor there are moonlight-beams shaped like a carpet. The walls are polished with magic wax. Everything is bright and all this light makes me dizzy. Also the odor of the wax is terrible; it smells like flowers and I hate this scent.

I am only slightly comforted by the dishes: skewered frogs, snake-skins stuffed with baby bat meat, fungus salad made of mushroom-seed, wet mouse noses, and hemlock. And beer brewed by the swamp witch, and sparkling saltpeter champagne from graveyard vaults; my favorite one.

I check on the guests of the banquet: there are night ravens, tailed trolls -the troll nobility – sea people, goblins, brownies, elves. Something important must be going on that the elves decided to invite so many distinguished people.

The old Elf-king stands up, and lifting his glass of wine made of toad saliva and frog urine, speaks with his musical voice. He stares at me; I hear him as clearly as if he was talking in my mind. “To the upcoming wedding of my two daughters with the two princes of Trolland”, he says. Everybody applauds and the noise of the applause resounds like fireworks burning my mind. How-MY sons? My beautiful children are going to marry those monstrous thin, blond, blue eyed freaks dressed in cobweb and silk and flowers? No. No, it can’t be. I want to scream, but no noise comes out of my mouth. Better keep quiet. My sons will never accept this-NEVER!!!

When my two sons get up and start dancing with the two elf princesses, I cannot control myself: I yell and yell and yell ….and then I wake up.

It takes a while, but finally I realize that this was but a dream and I sigh in relief. I see the burnt rat hair, dried amanita and pigs bristles my maid burned for incense to cure my elfish flu. This is probably what has caused the nightmare. Rat Incense is good for my running nose; it makes it stay where it is. But everybody knows that it can cause nightmares and hallucinations”.