My teeth sleep in a water glass,
my hair is falling out.
I have an everlasting hemorrhoid,
the shingles and the gout.
I get lost in my own kitchen,
but find a doorway by and by,
just to find I’m in another room,
and can’t remember why.
Today I’ll need no fiber,
no bean or bran to fuss about.
My incontinental breakfast,
will find a way to soon come out.
I know you think I’m whining,
but just wait you brash young pup.
One day you’ll need to go lie down,
if you could just get up.